SCC Fic: "The Things You Never'd Think You'd Miss"

[lifeonqueen]

"The Things You'd Never Think You'd Miss"
Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles
Derek (warning: bad language, spoilers for series)
For indiefic


Derek Reese had never been one of Connor's chosen few. He hadn't bled and schemed in Century with the man; hadn't stormed the wire to tear down the machines; hadn't helped build an army out of scraps and hope. That was all Kyle.

But that never mattered much. Derek would always be a little jealous of the relationship between John and Kyle but truth was, from General Perry to the greenest noob out of the tunnels, they all belonged to John Connor.

It didn't matter, for example, that the day John Connor broke out of Century Work Camp, Derek Reese had been a tunnel rat running a pack of thieves and scavengers in Glendale. Derek had been a king rat but a rat all the same until the day General Perry kicked through the makeshift the door to the high school boiler room they called home.

"When you crawled out of whatever festering hole you call a bed this morning you were nothing. Less than nothing. Human beings that preyed on other human beings. Lower than dogs. Worse than the machines."

Perry stalked back and forth as he talked, the biggest, baddest cat in the room, rippling with good health, on fire with holy zeal and carrying the largest fucking gun Derek had ever seen. Behind him, a half-dozen soldiers in uniform, hooting and cheering as he spoke The Gospel According to John Connor.

"But today, today is your lucky day, motherfuckers. Because today is the day John Connor sent me to turn you from nothing into something. Today is the day you take back your humanity from those metal ratfuck sons-of-bitches. Today is the first day of your life. Today you are born again.

"Today you are the 132nd Battalion of the 1st Human Army."

He turned and took a spray can one of his soldiers held ready and painted a crimson 1-3-2 over their tag.

"This is your colours now. This is the only colour that matters - blood. Red human blood. Honour it. Fight for it. Stand with John Connor and take back your world from the machines."

Belief, faith, passion - whatever you want to call it - streamed off Perry in waves. "So what do you say? Will you fight with us? Will you fight for John Connor?"

As Perry's crew started chanting Connor's name, Derek was the only one stupid enough to open his mouth. "What if we say no?"

And then Perry broke his wrist.

Later, while Perry's non-coms pulled apart his crew to teach them how things were gonna work in John Connor's army, Perry's medic set and splinted the bones in Derek's wrist using rags and thin lengths of rebar. It had hurt worse than anything physical he'd experienced ever. Even so, he was half-in love with the strawberry blonde by the time she was done. He wanted to ask her name but the minute she finished, Perry ordered her away to inventory their stash. Derek had watched her go, thinking about how that morning this had been his place, his crew. And now he was what?

"On your feet, soldier." Perry hauled him up by his good arm. "Time's burning and we've got a war to fight."

He must have made a face. "Don't worry, son." Perry shoved him towards the group huddled around the soldier drawing a map on the wall of the basement. "You belong to John Connor now."

Derek Reese hadn't belonged to anyone or anything in a long time. The absolute conviction of Perry's words kindled a warmth in the cold parts of Derek's soul that never totally faded and he could never quite put out. Not even after he lost Kyle a second time. Not until he found himself standing over his brother's grave in the warm California sun as Sarah-Almighty-Connor reminded him just how much he didn't belong. Not to John, certainly not to Sarah, not to Jesse - his wrist didn't even ache anymore.

Derek found he missed it.